Lee Hammock is most popular on social media for his advice to women and men about how to identify Narcissists. He also teaches how to overcome and deal with their behaviors through his personal experiences.
We’ll start with super signs that you are dealing with a narcissist: when they hoard conversations, expect preferential treatment, and violate social rules. Not every person with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, but many narcissists will feel real good about spreading negative emotions to gain attention, feel more powerful, and keep people close to them insecure and off-balance. You will find they are easily upset and jump into defense mode after any constructive criticism. They are extremely sensitive to criticism, and will usually respond with something you did probably 25 years ago. This may turn into a heated argument and the issue isn’t resolved because they found a way to make it your fault, “But don’t forget you did such and such in 2019.”
It’s always fight or flight. On the other hand, narcissists are often quick to judge, criticize, ridicule, and or blame others.
Some will to often throw a tantrum if you disagree with them, or their views, or fail to meet their expectations. Some narcissists are emotionally abusive, making you feel inferior, they boost their tender ego, making them feel better and their actions justified.
But what better way to learn more about Narcissistic Personality than by speaking to an expert? We had the chance to catch up with Lee Hammock and gain more clarity on the subject that has had everyone discovering that they just may have been dealing with a Narcissist.
What inspired you to take your personal diagnosed narcissistic journey to social media and did you think it would get you to over a million followers?
LEE: I honestly started my platform in May 2022 to show men that it was ok to go to therapy and talk out your issues with a professional instead of taking out your anger and things on your family and friends. I had no idea that it would take off the way it has on all my platforms. It really is incredible how many people I’ve actually been able to reach.
Are you grateful for any narcissistic tendencies you have learned to let go of or change?
LEE: It’s going to sound weird but I am actually grateful for my ability to emotionally disconnect sometimes. Especially when I’m talking to someone that is dealing with a narcissist or toxic person and they themselves become overwhelmed with emotions. I can kind of disconnect from them and give them a POV (Point of View) from a logical standpoint which helps out a lot of people.
What are the 3 biggest Red flags that let you know a narcissist is a narcissist during the first conversation?
LEE:
1) Future faking on the first date or so. Like telling you that they see a future together with you because you are special and such. Like selling you a dream about where you could go together and what you could do.
2) Speed – trying to move things way too fast on the first date. Telling you they have deep feelings for you and they’ve “never felt this way before about anyone so quickly.” I tell people that speed is the weapon of a narcissist.
3) (This is going to sound weird) but they make the conversation ALL about you. They ask you deep, penetrating questions while they hardly provide you with any information about themselves. Don’t give people the blueprint to manipulate you and become who they need to be to get you.
Check out the Full Interview with Lee Hammock in our JAN|FEB Black Love Issue!
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