Ella McLendon more famously known as Coach Ella Destiny is an Author, Motivational Speaker, and life/inspirational coach. She is a survivor to the fullest extent of the word, 11 abdominal surgeries, weeks in the hospital fighting for her life, a teen mom, failed marriages, depression, you name it, she has conquered it. Even most recently losing her father to Covid19 but being who she is and encouraging people to get off the sidelines of life and live life with purpose, Coach Ella Destiny is someone that will always overcome. Speaking with her was truly inspiring and insightful, so we had to share the conversation with you.
One having access to a Life Coach is very essential to maintaining strong mental health. At what period in your life did you choose to be a guide to others by assisting them with identifying their life goals?
I think it was during my season of waiting. I was at a standstill in my life, with no guidance, no direction and just waiting to hear from God. During that time, I realized my purpose. I spent lots of alone time listening, talking, being still, and waiting for the answer to my next. It was at that time, I was led to serve and guide.
I love that you incorporate the spirituality component into your practice, what advice would you share with FEMI readers in regard to how to tap into their own unique superpowers?
We all have a gift and a purpose whether we know it or not. The challenge is finding out what that is and what that looks like for us. I have a Purpose/Passion class that I teach on how to do just that. How to differentiate between what our purpose is as opposed to our passion, and how to tap into it. You have to find that thing. The thing that keeps you up at night, the thing that you just can’t stop thinking about, dreaming about. The thing that fills you up and makes you feel fulfilled when you do; it comes effortlessly. That’s passion. That’s your unique superpower. That’s the beginning of tapping into it.
At what point in your life did you decide that you were going to be a certified Life / Inspirational Coach?
My ah-ha moment! When I realized that the things I was “growing” through weren’t anything new. All that happened to me happened before in the bible, and once I figured out how to use that to navigate through it, it was my mission and commission to help someone else.
Did you encounter any challenges or personal obstacles on your path to becoming “Coach Ella Destiny?” If so, how did you keep yourself motivated to overcome those obstacles?
Absolutely! No one ever said the road would be easy as cliché’ as it sounds. It’s the entire truth. There was lots of hurt, pain, anger, frustration and so many other things along the journey, but I understood there was a purpose for my pain. I understood God had to allow these things to come upon me just like he did Job in the bible, and that’s what kept me motivated. I would insert myself in the scripture, “have you tried my servant Ella.” That’s how I was able to overcome it.
Not often is Mental Health and Personal Development prioritized in the African American Community, in fact, many individuals believe that speaking to professionals in the mental health community is an invasion of privacy. What advice would you give to someone who believes that seeking “outside advice” about problems is not necessary?
Seeking outside advice is something I’m all for; it’s not a bad thing at all. I think when we don’t seek outside advice and hold all of that “stuff” in, is when it starts to become a problem. Being completely open and transparent, there was a time when I sought and saw a psychiatrist myself. Not because I was “crazy” or something was wrong with me as society would have it, but because I was smart enough to know when I’d had enough; when I needed to step outside of my circle and get unbiased counsel. Sometimes the people that we surround ourselves with daily hinder our mental growth. Because they love us and don’t want to hurt us or say anything wrong, they don’t hold us accountable to our actions and truth and so we walk around thinking or expecting everyone to be that way and that hurts us. We need an environment where the person does not know us, won’t judge us, but will help us to protect our “mentals” and our peace. My advice is to try it for yourself, don’t prejudge or make your decision not to, based on what the world says.
Not only are you a life coach you are also a USA Fibroid Centers Ambassador, can you share with our readers your advocacy in regard to Fibroids and Teen Awareness?
I suffered from fibroids for many years and it changed my life in so many ways. When the opportunity presented itself to tell my story of how a hysterectomy landed me in the hospital on life support for a week and ultimately having 11 abdominal surgeries that left me without a navel as a result of them, I knew I HAD to speak up. I had to help other women, especially teens so that they wouldn’t go through what I’ve been through. It’s so important to me to have these conversations and share the information. We didn’t talk about it growing up. It was taboo and lots of times women suffered in silence because it’s just so uncomfortable. No one wanted to talk about how they bleed for days, weeks, sometimes months, going through 5-10 sanitary napkins per day, or how you’re afraid to wear white in fear of accidents. No one wants to talk about messing up bed sheets, being tired, drained mentally and physically so this was MY time. It’s time to talk about it. It’s time to share our stories and experiences. It’s time to take back our uterus and our lives. That’s why I became a brand ambassador to create a safe space for young women and to let them know they are not alone, that they have options and we can talk!
Is there anything that you would like to share with the FEMI Magazine Community?
Amazing, amazing community! Thank you all so much for the platform to share so many different bodies of work. You all rock!
Coach Ella Destiny is such an inspiration for women everywhere to keep going, find their purpose and elevate themselves in life. Be sure to check her out.
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