For Dr. Corey W. Holmes, golf has never been simply about the scorecard. It is about access, relationships, reflection and the kind of conversations that can reshape a man’s understanding of himself, his family and his purpose.
According to the National Golf Foundation, 7.7 million Black, Hispanic and Asian Americans play golf on-course, reflecting a changing landscape within a sport that has historically been associated with exclusivity. For Holmes, that shift represents something much larger than increased participation. It represents the power of proximity and the freedom to define what Black excellence looks like in spaces that were not always designed with Black people in mind.
A former U.S. Foreign Affairs Officer, father and author of Golf, Cigars & Scotch: Balancing Fatherhood, Friendship, and Fine Living, Holmes has experienced firsthand how relationships can develop when people step outside the formal structures of professional life. On a golf course, he says, there is time to talk without the pressure of an agenda, assistants or a clock counting down to the next meeting.
“Golf gives you four or five uninterrupted hours with someone,” Holmes explains. “In a business setting you’re always performing a role, but the game humbles everyone equally, so the walls come down.”
That access can be especially meaningful for Black professionals navigating industries and institutions where they have historically been underrepresented. Holmes believes the fairway can create an environment where relationships develop before transactions.
“The boardroom checks your pedigree. The fairway just asks if you’re good company for eighteen holes,” he says.
But for Holmes, some of the most valuable conversations happen after the final hole.
The “19th hole” has become a central concept in his philosophy because it represents a rare space where men can put down the expectations of strength and simply be honest. After spending several hours missing shots, making mistakes and laughing through the imperfections of the game, there is often little ego left to protect.
For Black men, Holmes believes that vulnerability can be particularly powerful.
“The 19th hole is the only place I know where Black men get a room with no scoreboard for their lives,” he says.
Over a cigar and an unhurried conversation, subjects such as marriage, money, fatherhood, fear, grief and uncertainty can come to the surface. These conversations are part of what inspired Holmes to write Golf, Cigars & Scotch, a book that challenges narrow portrayals of Black masculinity while celebrating brotherhood, presence and purposeful living.
Holmes’ vision of Black manhood is expansive. He rejects the idea that Black men should be defined solely by struggle, hustle or toughness. Instead, he advocates for a fuller picture that includes fathers, friends, readers, professionals, entrepreneurs and men who are allowed to grieve, laugh, enjoy beautiful experiences and build meaningful relationships.
“Fine living isn’t materialism; it’s permission — to enjoy your life, to be tender with your brothers, to define success on your own terms,” he says.
That philosophy also informs how Holmes approaches fatherhood.
His framework, “Stroke By Stroke: The Journey of Fatherhood,” draws a direct parallel between golf and raising children. On the course, forcing a swing rarely produces the desired result. Golf requires patience, fundamentals and the ability to focus on the shot in front of you rather than obsessing over the one you wish you had.
Holmes applies that same principle to parenting his son.
“My son isn’t a project to be finished; he’s a round to be played, hole by hole, present for each one,” he says. “You don’t parent the outcome. You parent the moment.”
That perspective has taken on an even broader meaning as Holmes raises his son abroad in the Dominican Republic. After spending much of his professional life in public service, living outside the United States has challenged him to think differently about opportunity, identity and legacy.
Rather than measuring success solely through American standards, Holmes sees the global Black experience as expansive and interconnected.
“He’ll inherit a map, not just a flag,” he says of his son.
For Holmes, that is one of the greatest gifts of the diaspora: the understanding that Black excellence is not confined to one country, one industry or one definition of success. It can travel, adapt and create new possibilities across borders.
That perspective is particularly relevant during National Black Business Month, when conversations about entrepreneurship and professional advancement often focus on building businesses, securing capital and expanding networks. Holmes believes golf can be another tool for young Black professionals and entrepreneurs looking to develop relationships and gain access to new circles.
His advice is simple: don’t wait until you’re good enough to participate.
“Don’t wait until you’re good — that’s the mistake everyone makes,” he says. “Nobody at that table cares about your handicap. They care that you showed up, that you can laugh at a bad shot, that you’re worth four hours of their time.”
For someone who has never picked up a club, that might mean taking a lesson, accepting an invitation or simply being willing to enter a space that initially feels unfamiliar. Holmes encourages newcomers to listen more than they talk and to understand that the greatest opportunities may come from the relationships developed over time.
“Opportunity in this game never came from my swing. It came from who was willing to walk the next round with me,” he says.
Ultimately, however, Holmes’ definition of success extends well beyond golf, business or professional accomplishments. His career has taken him into rooms and places many people may never experience, but fatherhood has taught him that achievement means little without presence.
“I’ve been in rooms most people never enter — and none of them mattered as much as a bedtime story,” he reflects.
That realization sits at the heart of Golf, Cigars & Scotch. The book is not simply about a sport or the finer things in life. It is about making room for the relationships and experiences that give achievement meaning.
For Holmes, purpose is not something waiting at the end of a career or another milestone. It is found in the conversations shared with friends, the lessons passed to children, the laughter after a bad shot and the quiet moments when people feel comfortable enough to tell the truth.
A life well lived, he believes, is ultimately measured by how fully we show up.
And sometimes, the most important lessons are learned one stroke, one conversation and one moment at a time.
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